Independence Day

It's Independence Day in the States, so I'm off for some family time.

Back tomorrow.

Happy Father's Day

It's Father's Day at Chez Szondy, which meant breakfast in bed (fortunately my wife helped with the fry up, so everyone survived), a morning at the dog park and a chore-free afternoon leading up to a massive steak and a cigar in the PM.

The day's even sunny. Someone is obviously asleep at the switch.

Happy Memorial Day

This is no war of chieftains or of princes, of dynasties or national ambition; it is a war of peoples and of causes. There are vast numbers, not only in this island but in every land, who will render faithful service in this war but whose names will never be known, whose deeds will never be recorded. This is a war of the Unknown Warriors; but let all strive without failing in faith or in duty, and the dark curse of Hitler will be lifted from our age.

Sir Winston Spencer Churchill

Happy Mother's Day

It's Mother's Day here at Chez Szondy, so I'm off for a bit of quality time.

Back tomorrow.

May Day

Members of the ham radio club are reminded the "Mayday" is not an invitation to throw papers in the air and shout "Viva Castro".

Happy St. George's Day

Happy St. George's Day
from
Ephemeral Isle

Happy Easter

Happy Easter
from
Ephemeral Isle

Meat Out

I was not aware that today is "Meat-Out" day-- when, according to the organisers, people can,

Kick the meat habit... and explore a wholesome, nonviolent diet of fruits, vegetables and whole grains.

I love the "nonviolent" bit-- as opposed to those other diets that involve hand-to-hand combat.

Now, if you will excuse me, I have an ox to roast.

Brian Cohen, Call Your Service

Telegraph headline:

Easter warning: crucifixion is bad for you

Good to see the news media on top of things.

Happy Saint Patrick's Day

It's Saint Patrick's Day at Chez Szondy, so while I'm tucking into slow-cooked corned beef and cabbage and a few pints of Guinness, here is the late, great Dave Allen to take up the slack.

Enjoy.



And for you married-types; yes, I did have to put the slow cooker out in the garage.

Happy Pi Day

Happy
3.141592653589793238462643383279502884197169
39937510582097494459230781640628620899862
80348253421170679821480865132823066470938
44609550582231725359408128481117450284102
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42454150695950829533116861727855889075098
38175463746493931925506040092770167113900
98488240128583616035637076601047101819429
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85233239073941433345477624168625189835694
85562099219222184272550254256887671790494
60165346680498862723279178608578438382796
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02221066118630674427862203919494504712371
37869609563643719172874677646575739624138
908658326459958133904780275901

St. David's Day

This wasn't sung at Rorke's Drift, but it damn well should have been.

Happy St. David's Day from Ephemeral Isle.

New Years Eve

It's New Year's Eve at Chez Szondy... and most everywhere else, I suppose.

See you in the new year-- hangovers permitting, of course.

Meantime, happy New Year from Ephemeral Isle.

Happy Christmas

Happy Christmas from Ephemeral Isle

Star Wars Holiday Special

Everything that The Phantom Menace could have been and more.

Will Chewbacca get home for life day? Will Harrison Ford ever live this down? Has Harvey Korman no shame? Did Mark Hamill need the money this badly? And what is Carrie Fisher breathing besides oxygen?

WARNING! Bea Arthur sings!

Christmas Cheer

Passing on the gift... of caffeine.

Santa Claus Conquers the Martians

It's the Christmas season, so what could be more appropriate than the awe and majesty of Santa Claus Conquers the Martians?

Caution: Do NOT watch this while sober.

Robby Christmas

If you're still doing your last minute Christmas shopping and have about ten grand to drop, then have a look at Fred Barton Productions for life size reproductions of Hollywood's most famous robots.

If I had a big enough house, I'd have the whole set lined up in the specially designed corridor leading to my office.

Happy Thanksgiving

It's Thanksgiving here in the United States, so I'm off for some quality family time and poultry overload.

Turkey Ten

The letters to the editor column in the Seattle Post-Intelligencer included this self-consciously cute "top ten" list from a vegetarian who clearly has been watching far too much David Letterman. It just ached for a fisking

10. You will pardon a turkey - just like President Bush, but for the right reasons.

Except the the presidential turkey is still alive while mine will be dead whether I pardon it or not. Is the bird supposed to spring like Lazarus from the supermarket deep freeze?

9. You'll celebrate life and good fortune, rather than death and misfortune.

Um... The bird is dead already, so the point is moot. And if the alternative is nut cutlets, I fail to see where the "good fortune" comes into the picture.

8. You won't suffer nightmares about how the turkey lived and died.

Don't now. Won't ever. Even if the shade of my departed feast showed up at midnight decked out like Marley's Ghost complete with chains, it would still be a turkey, which has the inherent fear factor of an overstuffed pigeon.

7. You won't have to call the Poultry Hotline to keep your family alive.

Not since I grasped that whole germ theory thing. The only threat a turkey will have to my family's life is if it's a killer cyborg turkey from the future hunting Sarah Connor. And that hasn't happened to me more than a couple of times.

6. You won't have to sweat the saturated fat and cholesterol.

I don't know what you do, but I generally sweat sweat.

5. Your vegetarian friends will adore you.

Oh, I'm really looking forward to that!

4. Your kids will tell their friends about their cool "tofurky."

The school bullies are really looking forward to that.

3. You won't fall asleep during the football game.

My napping habits are my own affair.

2. You are what you eat. Who wants to be a "butterball"?

Vegetarians in glass houses shouldn't throw stones.

1. Commercial turkeys are too fat to have sex. Could happen to you.

And vegetarians are too... No, it's too easy a shot.

A Suggestion

It's Thanksgiving in the States tomorrow and if you are still trying to sort out your menu, my friend here would like to make a suggestion.

Remembrance Sunday

God of our fathers, known of old,
Lord of our far-flung battle-line,
Beneath whose awful Hand we hold
Dominion over palm and pine
Lord God of Hosts, be with us yet,
Lest we forget lest we forget!

The tumult and the shouting dies;
The Captains and the Kings depart:
Still stands Thine ancient sacrifice,
An humble and a contrite heart.
Lord God of Hosts, be with us yet,
Lest we forget lest we forget!

Far-called, our navies melt away;
On dune and headland sinks the fire:
Lo, all our pomp of yesterday
Is one with Nineveh and Tyre!
Judge of the Nations, spare us yet,
Lest we forget lest we forget!

If, drunk with sight of power, we loose
Wild tongues that have not Thee in awe,
Such boastings as the Gentiles use,
Or lesser breeds without the Law
Lord God of Hosts, be with us yet,
Lest we forget lest we forget!

For heathen heart that puts her trust
In reeking tube and iron shard,
All valiant dust that builds on dust,
And guarding, calls not Thee to guard,
For frantic boast and foolish word
Thy mercy on Thy People, Lord!

Rudyard Kipling

Happy Guy Fawkes Day

Here it is Bonfire Night and I'm out of wood.

Bloody typical.

Happy Independence Day

It's Independence Day in the United States and to mark the occasion, I'm posting this clip of the amazingly popular fireworks at Chez Szondy.

We don't believe in half measures.

Happy Father's Day

Happy Father's Day from Ephemeral Isle

Top & Bottom

The Times has a very helpful list of the Top Ten Father's Day gifts that I sincerely hope I will not be receiving on Sunday.

It's a bit of a toss up, but I think the sheer terror of blasting down country roads in the jet-powered go-cart marginally beats the nauseating horror of the home fizzy lager dispenser.

St. George's Day

This royal throne of kings, this scepter'd isle,
This earth of majesty, this seat of Mars,
This other Eden, demi-paradise,
This fortress built by Nature for herself
Against infection and the hand of war,
This happy breed of men, this little world,
This precious stone set in the silver sea,
Which serves it in the office of a wall,
Or as a moat defensive to a house,
Against the envy of less happier lands,
This blessed plot, this earth, this realm, this England.

William Shakespeare

Richard II Act 2 Scene 1

Happy St. George's Day from Ephemeral Isle.

Mark Your Calendar

At last! A holiday that I can look forward to!